Starting Weight: 318.2 lbs.
Last Posted Weigh-in Weight: 241.2 lbs.
Current Weight: 240.8 lbs.
Weekly Change: –0.4 lbs.
Total Weight Lost: 77.4 lbs.
I’m late again—I know, and I’m sorry.
It’s Thursday evening and tomorrow is my typical weigh-in day, but instead of bombarding you with everything tomorrow, I decided that I wanted to do a post tonight to catch you up on the most important things.
For once, I’m not dwelling too much on my weight. It is what it is, I’m obviously still struggling (which is quite obvious with just a quick glance at my stats page), and I’m feeling overwhelmed.
I am not adjusting well to the new program Weight Watchers has rolled out, and I plan to thoroughly discuss that tomorrow in a post after my weekly weigh-in.
This is one of the only places in the world where I feel like I can be 100% honest without sugar-coating, so you will be privy to my true thoughts about SmartPoints and all that that entails if you should choose to read tomorrow.
I have, unfortunately, put myself in a position out here in “the real world” that’s forcing me to “fake it ’till I make it” in regards to this new plan, but here on the blog, I don’t plan to adhere to that.
So stay tuned.
And now… Drumroll, please!
As of five days ago, I am officially a college graduate!
I graduated from the University of Colorado this past Saturday with a Bachelor of Arts degree! I graduated with distinction (meaning my GPA was above 3.75) and I graduated summa cum laude (i.e., with major honors) for the work I did this past spring on my thesis, too!
I could not be happier, nor could I be prouder of myself. This was, without a doubt, one of the shining moments of my life.
Here is the photograph that is the absolute bane of my existence—the photograph that’s haunted me for nearly 5 years (since I graduated from high school):
I was well over 300 lbs. at this point, and the fact that this picture even exists is beyond humiliating. I was just a baby here—I was only 18-years-old. This is the one photo I have from the day, and it makes me cringe… It’s never been a photo I’ve ever wanted to display.
I wanted to be down 100 lbs. by the time I graduated from college—you all know that—but it just didn’t work out that way.
However… that isn’t important.
In the end, what I wanted, more than anything, was to be happy with myself on the day of my college graduation… to feel confident and be totally comfortable with the person that I am at this particular phase of my life.
And I also wanted just ONE picture of myself that I was happy with—just ONE! I told myself that under no circumstances could there be a repeat of the photo situation at my high school graduation… I couldn’t handle that this time around because this graduation was way more important to me, and I needed photographic evidence of it.
And, for once, the stars seemed to align…
This was, without a doubt, one of the happiest days of my life thus far… And I think that’s pretty obvious. I think I actually look happy, and I think you can actually see my confidence here. I felt good about myself, and I didn’t think about my weight one time.
I know that, in the grand scheme of things, my weight/weight loss was a big part of the reason why I was so happy, though. I didn’t have any problems walking (except for much, much later when my feet had finally had enough of my boots!), I didn’t have any issues standing for atrociously long periods of time, and I didn’t worry about fitting into seats or breaking seats… Or having to be squished in like a sardine next to an incredibly attractive guy who made conversation with me throughout the entire event and added me on Facebook directly after because we had such a good time goofing off!
If I’d still weighed over 300 lbs., I know that the day wouldn’t have been as enjoyable… I know that I’d have had a miserable time because I’d have been self-conscious and embarrassed and physically unable to handle the walking and standing required of me.
So I have a lot to be thankful for… And a lot that I need to keep working towards.
I’m trying so, so hard to hold on to these good feelings and tell myself that this is why I need to keep going—so that I can continue to have more moments like this!
However, it’s still been a struggle.
But, no matter what, no one gets to take this day away from me.
On December 12, 2015, I was the epitome of happiness—all 240 lbs. of me!
I hope you’re all well. I’ll be back tomorrow—for real this time!
Eat well. Be well.