Hello, hello, hello!
I’m late. You know this. I’m sorry.
I’m also up in weight! So my time away obviously hasn’t been very productive…
Last Posted Weight: 243.6 lbs.
Current Weight: 244.2 lbs.
Weekly Change: +0.6 lbs.
Total Weight Lost: 74 lbs.
I know I said I was going to write blogs every day last week documenting my food, but I realized quickly that that was a bad plan. I’m too busy these days to post trivial things… and daily blogs just to record my food? Yeah, that’s trivial.
Alison and I text each other every day… pretty much non-stop. We exchange pictures of our food and screenshots of our trackers, and when one of us has a binge, we confess and then talk it out. Over these past almost-two-years we’ve both been doing this, Alison has become one of my very best friends. We’re kindred spirits, and I’m really thankful that Weight Watchers and the blogosphere brought us together! We’re both so similar… We have a lot of the same problems and we struggle with a lot of the same issues, and that allows us to really be honest about what’s going on food and weight-wise… So, truthfully, I already have an accountability buddy… And the whole “I’m going to blog this!” thing just wasn’t appealing in light of what Alison and I already do…
I’m sorry I didn’t follow through with my posts, but it was for the best! I love everything about blogging, and I love, love, love the community we’ve built here on WordPress. What I love most about it is that it’s authentic, and that’s something I think about when I sit down to write… So if, suddenly, writing becomes a chore and I’m not adding anything of real value to our conversations, then what’s the point, you know?
This week hasn’t been great food-wise. I’m in the negatives, so I’m pretty much guaranteed a gain on Friday, but we’ll see. Note to self: do not eat a 28 point cinnamon roll on Friday again just because you technically can.
I’ve been doing a lot of introspection this week. A woman hopped on my scale at work a couple of days ago, and I was astounded by how much weight she’s lost. In less than two years’ time, she’s managed to lose nearly 200 lbs. When I went to mark her current weight down in her booklet and I saw the running total, I actually stopped to make sure I hadn’t made a mistake. When she informed me that she had, indeed, lost that much weight and then whipped out her “before” picture to prove it, I could’ve dropped dead.
It made me ruminate on the fact that my second re-birthday is coming up in just about four months, and if I don’t really pull it together, I’ll be the same weight on September 12th, 2016 as I was on September 12th, 2015… And I don’t want that!
I’ve done a lot of cool things during this second year of my health journey. I’ve done six 5Ks. I’ve started to actually enjoy buying clothes since I can officially buy off the rack—which, these days, I do more often than my bank account can really allot! I’ve started going on dates and opening myself up to new experiences, new people, and new places.
Yesterday, I even met up with the guy I’ve been talking to on the Internet for eight years (I’ve mentioned him a time or two here on the blog, but the specific posts escape me at the moment…). For a long time, I was afraid to meet him in-person because I never told him that I struggled with my weight. We were friends on MySpace and Facebook and lots of other social platforms, but I’ve always taken and posted what I like to call “strategic fat girl photos” online… meaning I never take full body shots, and I always try to make sure that I angle the camera in a way that makes me appear “skinny.”
Finally, though, I found the nerve to tell him a little snippet of my story, and he was, surprisingly, really supportive. When we finally met up yesterday, it was actually pretty cool. I felt as comfortable in my own skin as I ever have, and laying all of my cards out on the table was cathartic. It was like I was saying, This is me, I am who I am, and I finally like myself enough to show you!
So, yeah… Like I said, this second year of my health journey has been pretty cool. I feel like I really embodied Weight Watchers’ new idea of going Beyond the Scale.
However, I think that now it’s time to reevaluate and set some new goals… it’s time to be more introspective and figure out what it is that I truly want to focus on right now that’s going to help me be my best self—the happiest, healthiest version of me that I can possibly be. I know this means that I need to get the scale moving again… I know that just going Beyond the Scale isn’t going to cut it for much longer… It’s time to bring my focus back to the scale, no matter how hard that might be.
Also, I may or may not have registered for a 10K…
When you work for a health and lifestyle company, your coworkers can talk you into some pretty crazy shit!
I hope you’re all doing well. Thanks for always helping make my journey worth it!